いいてんき
だけどこころに
イイじゃない
さむいいす
ワタシのしたに
へんなもの
たべました
おいしいケーキ
いまヘビー！
ねこのまえ
とりがトブトブ
とりはどこ？
It is very strange to compose such short poems especially when I have not yet learned the shorter/informal verb forms. More to be added... I want to try to write a sestina in Japanese, but I think that might take a while.
(Revised on 12/7 for clarity...)
いい せんりゅうですね。
ReplyDeleteI am curious why you wrote イイ、ワタシ、and トブトブ in Katakana.
Why did you choose Katakana in stead of writing them in Hiragana or Kanji?
「ねこのまえ とりがトブトブ とりはどこ？」が一ばんすきです。ユーモアがありますね。
ReplyDeletedear まゆみさん、
ReplyDeleteIn the first one, I wrote イイ to try to capture the feeling of being ill at ease. I wanted to use the katakana to have a jarring effect. Similar idea in the second one; I was thinking about feeling 'out of place' in a cold chair metaphorically, so ワタシ is the only word in katakana in a poem of hiragana. Finally, in the last one, I was thinking of how often in Japanese sound effects are written in katakana, so I tried to give the verb とぶ a similar impression to a sound effect (maybe the sound of wings flapping?) by writing in katakana & repeating it.
Reading back over these, the first two are depressing and the second two are totally silly! Strange...
Anyways, that's why I used the katakana I did!
えと、にばんにどうしていすはさむいですか。てんきはさむいですか。I like what you wrote about using katakana for "Watashi" so that "you" are literally - in the text - out of place.
ReplyDelete